


Wake Up, Before You Lose It All

by Sunless_Garden



Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: F/M, M/M, Mpreg
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-25
Updated: 2017-02-25
Packaged: 2018-09-26 18:43:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,649
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9915977
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sunless_Garden/pseuds/Sunless_Garden
Summary: Set a few years in the future, Spock and Kirk are a happily bonded couple and they both wanted the bond. Spock gets hurt on an away mission and gets amnesia, forgetting everything, including the bond. He believes he's still with Uhura and Jim wanting his lover to be happy, allows this. Uhura goes along because she still loves Spock.





	

The intercom crackled, and Bones's voice came over.

"Captain - we need you at sickbay," the doctor informed him.

"I'm on my way," Jim answered. "Sulu, you have the conn."

The one away mission Jim didn’t go on, and Spock got hurt. Jim had sat by his bedside for hours, but Bones said there wasn't anything that Jim could do and that he had to stop thinking about it.

Stress was bad for the baby.

Jim let his hand fall to his stomach, where their child - their son - was just beginning to grow. Three months pregnant, and so Jim was stuck on the Enterprise when Spock got attacked on the latest away mission. His lover and first officer had managed to contact Scotty just before he hit his head and fell unconscious.

He had been in the sickbay for three days now, and Jim was going crazy with worry. But he needed to be strong - for both Spock and their child.

Jim walked into sickbay, and the first thing he saw was Spock sitting up on one of the biobeds.

He couldn't resist running forward and throwing his arms around his lover's neck, holding back tears of relief as he buried his head in his lover's warm chest.

"Captain, this is highly inappropriate behavior. I have recovered, and as such there is no need for such emotionality," Spock's voice stated, clipped and cold and concise.

Jim pulled back, confused - Spock hadn't spoken like that to him in ages. He was used to gentle tones and fond amusement - especially after Spock had found out he was pregnant.

His Vulcan lover was so protective and accommodating that it nearly drove Jim up the wall.

"Spock?" he asked, unsure, looking into his lover's deep brown eyes.

They didn't contain a trace of the love that he had come to rely on.

"Jim..." Bones greeted, coming out of his office.

"Bones," Jim greeted back, looking at the doctor with pleading eyes.

What was wrong with Spock?

"Jim...he's lost about three years of memories," Bones informed him sadly.

"Three years, two months, five days, and four point two hours, if the doctor gave me the correct current stardate," Spock told them blandly.

It was not morning sickness that caused Jim to throw up his lunch into the nearest bin.

Jim left the sickbay after Bones explained that Spock's memory may or may not come back. Brain injuries and amnesia were tricky, even with 23rd century medicine.

Spock had handled himself stiffly, in the way he had the first few months of their acquaintance. God...three years, gone just like that.

Jim and Spock had barely been friends three years ago.

And when Spock had asked for Uhura?

Well, Jim had to leave. He gave Spock a weak "feel better" and high-tailed it out of there.

Jim's hand dropped to their baby...at least if Spock never remembered their relationship, he would still have their child. He didn’t know how he would explain it to Spock in six months when their quarter-Vulcan child was born, but right now their son was all he had left of his lover.

His lover...who was still in love with Lieutenant Uhura, who was really still in love with him.

And Jim, who was the one left behind - because Bones said that just telling him everything that happened would impede his recovery. That Spock had to remember everything on his own, or not at all.

Jim shut his eyes against the tears, using the intercom to tell Sulu that he didn’t feel well and was going to his quarters to take a nap - the entire bridge crew was aware of his pregnancy and almost as overprotective as Spock is - was - and so nobody will give him shit.

Jim curled up on their bed, pulling Spock's pillow to his face so the calming scent of his lover enveloped him.

He didn’t know how he would explain to Spock that the first officer's quarters were empty...Spock had moved into his a few months after their relationship began. Almost two and a half years now...

Jim allowed himself a few tears, blaming it on the pregnancy hormones.

God, what was he going to do without Spock?

*****

_One month later..._

Jim was speaking to the Deltan ambassador, trying to ignore Spock and Uhura and their quiet, intimate conversation in the corner of the room.

Jim was the best person for the job right now - Starfleet assigned him this diplomatic mission specifically because he was four months pregnant. It was a little-known fact, but Deltan pheromones did not affect those already gestating, so Jim could be trusted to keep his head the way other people couldn't.

"Captain Kirk, you seem distracted," Ambassador Kai informed him with some concern in his dark blue eyes.

"I am sorry, Ambassador," Jim replied, forcing a winning smile on his face. "I'm a bit tired."

He had found that Deltans were very protective and understanding of pregnant people - something to do with a low birth rate (the pheromones were needed because it took a lot of sex before a Deltan could reproduce...). The ambassador immediately pulled out a seat for him at a nearby table, helping Jim find a comfortable position off his feet before they continued their small talk.

"Where is the child's other father?" Kai asked with a small frown, asking the question that Jim dreaded the most. "Should he not be nearby in case you need anything?"

Jim let his gaze drift to Spock, still conversing quietly with Uhura. Scotty and Bones were over by the free bar, trying to ignore the Deltan pheromones. Sulu and Chekov were dealing with it their own way - with each other. Jim smiled wanly at the ambassador.

"The child's father is unable to be in his life at the moment," he informed him quietly, avoiding all mention of names and particular circumstances.

The Deltan looked at him, shocked.

"Does he know that your are with child?" Kai asked.

Jim nodded in response.

"Then unless he is dead, there is no excuse for him not standing by your side. Children are very precious, and they need love from both parents," Kai told him seriously. "Have you considered taking another mate?"

Jim blinked at him, getting the sense that they were venturing into dangerous territory.

"My job does not allow for meeting many suitable candidates," he responded, trying to get away from this topic without being rude.

"I would be honored if you would take me as a mate," Kai informed him, reaching forward to touch his hand gently, stroking Jim's palm with his thumb. "I would raise your son as my own. And Delta IV would be happy to have an ambassador representing them aboard such a distinguished ship as the Enterprise."

Jim has not been touched so gently and affectionately in so long, and he was lonely and sad and pregnant and horny and vulnerable, and he wondered if maybe Deltan pheromones did still affect pregnant people, but maybe not as much?

"I..." he began to respond, breath catching in his throat as Kai brought his hand up to his mouth for a chaste kiss to his palm.

"You do not have to decide now," Kai informed him. "I am quite taken with you, but I can wait. I will petition my government for a posting aboard the Enterprise, and I will court you and take care of you as you deserve."

Jim didn’t know what to say. He wanted to tell Kai 'no' - he wanted to tell him about the extenuating circumstances with Spock and that he would wait forever if he had to.

But what if Spock never remembered? What if Spock married Uhura and had a baby with her and when Jim had his son he didn’t even care?

And Jim has been so alone...even with Bones hovering like a mother hen and Chekov making him Russian foods and Sulu giving him all sorts of plants and Scotty fixing up a state-of-the-art playroom for the baby...

Because his friends and crew were amazing, but they were knot his lover. Jim missed the touch of naked skin against his own, and he didn’t want to touch anyone else - he didn’t, it would be unfaithful to Spock - but Spock was unfaithful to him, even if he didn’t know it...

And he was just so lonely.

So he just nodded in acquiesce to Kai's proposal. He hadn’t really agreed to anything serious...courting wasn’t even dating, really. It was like...deciding whether you should date.

It would be nice to have somebody there for him...

*****

Spock watched as the Deltan ambassador brought the captain's hand up to his lips, and he felt the strong, instinctive urge to go over and rip the bald, handsome man away.

And then rip him apart with his bare hands.

It was not logical to feel this way - it would not be logical even had the ambassador been touching Nyota such a way, and it was even more illogical that he was feeling so defensive of the captain, who was barely a friend and who most certainly could defend himself.

But he saw the way the captain's eyes softened as the ambassador whispered something, low and intimate, and Spock decided that it was his duty as first officer to make sure that the captain was not being taken advantage of in his vulnerable state.

No one was telling him how, exactly, the captain was four months pregnant. The procedure for male pregnancy was not extremely risky - but it was not undertaken without much consideration. Spock sometimes wondered who the other father was, and what happened to him, because the captain often looked sad whenever someone asked.

Spock excused himself from his conversation with Nyota and headed towards the table where the ambassador and the captain were sitting.

"Captain. Ambassador," Spock greeted with a deferential nod of his head.

The captain smiled at him sadly, and the ambassador's gaze did not waver from the human’s handsome face as they gave their own greetings in response.

Spock wondered when he began to think of the captain as handsome, because while James Kirk could certainly be considered aesthetically appealing by most humanoid standards, Spock had never been one to notice such things.

He had a flash of the captain on his back, full pink lips curved in a sweet smile as he laid back against white sheets, face and erection flushed as he places a hand on his gently curving stomach, beckoning Spock forward.

Spock blinked, the fantasy gone in a second as the captain welcomed him into his conversation with the ambassador.

Spock felt another surge of illogical anger as Ambassador Kai of Delta IV informed him of his intent to join the Enterprise on their next mission, and perhaps beyond.

He would not allow this being to take advantage of his captain's vulnerable state.

*****

_Three months later..._

Nyota gave him a chaste kiss good-bye before Spock headed towards the transporter. Spock stood stiffly until she pulled back to stand beside the captain, who was grinning tensely.

Perhaps he was tired? The captain was seven months pregnant, after all, and still working just as diligently as he was at the beginning of their mission. Ambassador Kai was standing behind him, hand resting gently but possessively on the captain's back.

"Come back safe, guys," the captain told Spock, Sulu, and Ensign Smythe. "That's an order."

The ensign straightened his posture even more in response, proud to have been chosen for this mission by his captain. Sulu shot his captain a small grin while Spock gave a sharp nod before they were beamed down to the planet.

Everything that could go wrong, did. Although the captain was not there to offend the natural inhabitants of the planet, Sulu managed to do so in his place.

Spock luckily managed to get all three of them to safety, before ordering Scotty to beam them back up to the Enterprise.

"Duck!" Sulu told him, dark eyes wide as he gazed over Spock's shoulder.

Spock did not have time to react, and the last thing he felt before he faded into unconsciousness was the strange sensation of dematerializing.

Spock dreamt - but they were not truly dreams, but his missing memories.

_Ending his association with Nyota because though he cared for her, he did not love her as she loved him. She accepted his decision, though he could tell that she was hiding her true emotions beneath friendship and professionalism..._

_Captain Kirk inviting him to his quarters for a chess game, and Spock turning him down..._

_Captain Kirk offending their hosts and getting them into a dangerous situation, and then his unique creative brilliance getting them out. He took a hit meant for Spock, and it was the first time since his mother that someone else had put his needs before their own..._

_Captain Kirk smiling at him from the biobed...the captain's chair...the bench in the mess hall..._

_Calling the captain "Jim" for the first time..._

_Bonding together over another dangerous mission..._

_Being stuck in that cave for three days, with nothing but Jim's faith and hope and optimistic spirit, and having to huddle together at night for warmth. Jim's skin was so smooth..._

_Bonding together over chess..._

_Sharing stories of their childhoods - Jim's stepfather and Spock's bullies - over whiskey and chocolate..._

_Spock jumped in front of the spear meant for his captain, and he got a salty (tears, Jim was crying for him...) kiss as his reward. As his vision went black, he thought that he could not regret giving his life for his captain...and his love..._

_Waking up in sickbay, Jim sleeping in the chair beside his bed..._

_T'hy'la._

_Pon farr...so afraid of hurting Jim...but Jim understood, and he helped him through it...and he tried to hide the bruises after it was done..._

_Jim's mind...golden and warm and welcoming...absolute trust and unconditional love...._

_More missions...more love...the way they moved together so perfectly...Jim getting him to loosen up and laugh every once in a while, in private..._

_Going to Dr. McCoy - and the procedure was successful. Jim was going to have their child...their son..._

_Jim throwing up in the mornings...Jim flushed from their love-making at night..._

_Jim kissing him good-bye before he left for his first away mission without his captain and his lover..._

_Running, and running, and running - he needed to get back to the Enterprise. He needed to get back to his lover and his child..._

**Everything went black...**

Spock woke up in sickbay with a start, breathing heavily and sweating. His head turned to the chair besides his bed.

Instead of his Jim - his t'hy'la - he saw instead Nyota.

How could he have forgotten?

"Spock!" Nyota exclaimed with relief, leaning forward for a kiss.

Spock turned his head, not able to stand the thought of her touching him, especially when he had left his t'hy'la alone and pregnant and vulnerable for four months...

How could he have forgotten? The way Jim looked at him with love...under him with lust...beside him in trust.

Spock got up, needing to find his t'hy'la - needing to apologize and beg forgiveness and promise that he would never, ever forget again, if only Jim would take him back into his arms. He needed Jim to know that he was sorry, that he loved Jim and their child more than anything...

"Who said you could get up, you stubborn..." Dr. McCoy muttered, walking up to Spock and attempting to force him back into the bed.

"Where is my mate?" Spock asked darkly. "Where is Jim?"

He heard Nyota gasp in emotional pain behind him, but he did not care.

He could not care for anyone but Jim and his child at the moment.

Dr. McCoy gaped for a second, before recovering himself.

"About time you remembered...I guess that second blow to your hard head actually did the trick..." the doctor joked. "And Jim is probably sleeping, I imagine. He is seven months pregnant, you know..."

Spock stiffened at the reminder of all the time with Jim he had lost...he had missed watching Jim's body grow and change...missed the flush pregnancy had put on Jim's cheeks...

And then he remembered Ambassador Kai...

What if Jim, in his pain, had turned to the other?

Spock knew that he would not blame his t'hy'la. He knew how much Jim feared being left alone - being abandoned.

Being forgotten.

Spock walked out of sickbay stiffly, ignoring Dr. McCoy's protests and Nyota's pleas. He needed to see Jim, to talk to him, to beg forgiveness - no matter what the outcome may be.

Spock stopped at the door to their quarters - to Jim's quarters. He has not lived here for four months...he wondered if Jim had made any changes...Spock entered his code, wondering if it would still work...

It did.

Spock stopped inside the doorway, letting the door close behind him. Jim was curled up on his side in the middle of the bed, Spock's pillow gripped tightly to his chest.

Spock could not deny the guilt and pain he felt at the sight of tear tracks on Jim's beautiful face, contorted in loneliness and grief even in sleep.

And he could not deny the relief he felt at the thought that Jim still missed him - still loved him - and that relief was magnified by the absense of Ambassador Kai in Jim's bed.

His t'hy'a shifted a little bit, and the blanket slipped down his body, revealing his heavy stomach. Jim shivered at the cold, and Spock stepped forward.

He was just going to fix the blanket for Jim...he didn’t want his lover to be cold...it had nothing at all to do with the overwhelming desire to touch Jim - to touch his face, and caress the rest of his body, but most especially his stomach, which was round with their child...

Their son.

Jim's eyes fluttered open sleepily when Spock pulled the blanket up.

"Spock?" Jim whispered, voice husky from sleep. "Don't...go away. I don't want to have this dream again tonight. Just...just leave me alone. It's always worse when I wake up."

Spock's heart broke at the pain in his t'hy'la's voice. He dropped to his knees beside their bed, reaching out a hand to brush the tears from Jim's cheeks.

"You are not dreaming," Spock reassured him.

Jim let out a choked laugh, but there was no amusement in the sound.

"You say that every time..." he whispered, burying his face in Spock's pillow. "Your pillow doesn't even smell like you anymore..."

That last, heartbroken admission snapped something in Spock, and he could not help but lay beside Jim, over the covers. He needed to be close to his lover...he needed to reassure him...

"I am here, Jim...I remember everything, and I am sorry that I ever forgot," Spock told him, wiping away the tears that were just falling faster.

Jim let out a hitching sob, his hand falling to his stomach to cradle it protectively.

"M'sorry, baby," Jim whispered to himself - to their son, closing his eyes and refusing to look at Spock. "I know this isn't good for you. I have to be happy, so you'll be happy."

Spock's hand fell down to that bump as well, starting when he felt movement underneath the skin.

Their son...he had missed so much...

Spock swore to himself that he would not miss anymore. He would prove to Jim that he was not going to leave him - not again.

But Jim had already fallen back into a fitful sleep, and Spock did not dare wake him. He looked so tired...

So the Vulcan slipped underneath the covers, huddling closer to his pregnant lover.

They could talk again in the morning...

*****

Spock woke before his beloved t’hy’la, but he refused to rise from the bed. He needed to be there when Jim woke up – he needed to prove to his love that he was real. That he was really there.

And that he was not going to leave him again.

Spock looked down at Jim’s beautiful face, relaxed in sleep though his eyes and cheeks were red from crying. He wished to caress those features, to reassure himself of his love’s vitality, but he did not have the right to touch Jim without his express permission.

Not after everything he had put his pregnant lover through.

Spock looked up when the door to the captain’s quarters opened and Ambassador Kai stepped through. The handsome Deltan was holding a tray of food, and he stopped dead when he spotted the Vulcan laying in the captain’s bed.

“What are you doing?” the Deltan growled. “Taking advantage of James’s vulnerable state?”

Spock rose gracefully, staring at the male that coveted his pregnant t’hy’la.

“That would be illogical,” he disputed. “I am simply waiting for Jim to awaken.”

“In his bed?” Kai asked sarcastically. “Why are you here instead of with your lieutenant?”

“I am where I belong,” Spock stated firmly.

The Deltan scoffed, walking forward to place the tray on Jim’s nightstand.

“James,” he called softly, reaching forward to touch Jim’s face as Spock has wished to do – as Spock had refrained himself from doing.

“K-Kai?” Jim asked sleepily, reaching up a hand to wipe to grit from his eyes. “You brought me breakfast again?”

“Every morning, James,” Kai replied fondly.

Jim gave a weak smile to the Deltan, but then the blood drained out of his face as he spotted Spock over Kai’s shoulder.

“Spock? You’re out of sickbay already?” he asked the Vulcan, struggling to sit up in bed.

Kai reached down to help him, moving the pillows to support his sore back. Jim blushed at this display of weakness before his once-lover, and he covered his vulnerability by grabbing a glass of orange juice from the tray and taking the time to gather his wits.

“I entered your quarters last night, Jim, but you were not coherent,” Spock informed him gently.

Jim dropped the glass at the sound of his first name from the Vulcan’s lips – and at the soft, gentle tone that he had come to miss so much in the past four months.

“S-Spock?” he asked uncertainly. “You…you were really here last night? It wasn’t just a dream?”

Spock walked forward and dropped to his knees besides Jim’s bed – ignoring the glaring Deltan – and he tentatively reached a hand forward to brush Jim’s fingers with his own.

The human inhaled sharply, returning the contact for a fleeting second before withdrawing his hand.

“You – remember?” he asked uncertainly.

Spock nodded in affirmation, staring into Jim’s hopeful eyes.

“Wait a moment,” Kai interrupted. “What is your first officer supposed to remember?”

Jim turned pain-filled eyes to the Deltan – his support for the past three months of Spock’s absence.

“Spock…Spock is my baby’s other father,” he admitted, though he did not want to hurt Kai.

The Deltan did not look hurt – in fact, he looked livid.

“You have impregnated James, and yet you are engaged in a romantic relationship with another?” he asked, indignant on the pregnant human’s behalf.

Kai strode forward to push Spock away from Jim’s sitting form, and Spock rose to his feet fluidly.

“There were extenuating circumstances,” Spock informed him. “Though that is no excuse. If Jim will have me, I am ready to resume my duties as bondmate and expectant father.”

Kai glared at him, and the normally peaceful ambassador gave into his anger to punch the Vulcan in the jaw.

“And when you change your mind again?” he asked protectively.

“I will not,” Spock refuted. “As I stated, there were extenuating circumstances.”

“No circumstance but death should take an honorable male away from his pregnant mate,” the Deltan replied, blocking Jim from Spock’s view.

“Kai…” Jim interrupted, struggling to bring his feet to the floor and stand. “Spock suffered memory loss due to head trauma. He didn’t remember that we were bonded, and he didn’t know that the baby was his.”

Kai turned to him, eyes softening in affection as he helped support the struggling man. Human males were not designed to gestate, and Jim’s slip hips meant his pregnant stomach often unbalanced him.

“And how did he mysteriously recover his memory after all these months?” the Deltan questioned.

“I don’t know,” Jim admitted, turning questioning eyes to Spock.

“The head trauma I received on the last mission pushed me into a Vulcan healing trance, and I recovered my lost memories,” Spock explained. “That is the most probably explanation.”

Jim nodded, taking a tentative step towards his wayward lover and stumbling – grimacing as a pain shot up his lower back and the baby kicked in protest.

“James, are you quite all right?” Kai questioned worriedly, as Spock stepped forward to share the burden of Jim’s weight.

Jim’s usually tan face was sickly white, and he nervously glanced down as he felt wetness between his thighs.

“No,” Jim stated – both an answer to Kai’s question and a denial of reality. “No.”

Both Spock and Kai looked down to see the blood spreading over Jim’s boxer shorts and beginning to drip down his thighs.

“The baby,” Jim gasped, gripping Spock’s arm tightly as another pain shot up his back. “It’s too early!”

Kai let Spock sweep Jim into his arms, reaching for the communicator and paging Dr. McCoy.

“What?” the doctor grumbled. “It’s barely alpha shift.”

“James is experiencing complications,” Kai informed him, voice shrill with worry. “Myself and First Officer Spock will accompany him to sickbay.”

“Goddammit, Jim,” McCoy exclaimed. “Hold in there for me, kid, okay? Hold in there for the baby.”

“Bones,” Jim just replied weakly. “I need Bones.”

Spock nodded tensely, carrying his lover out of his room and into the hallways as Kai trailed beside them.

“Stay with us, Jim. Breathe slowly and relax,” the Deltan coaxed soothily, but Jim did not respond.

The world was spinning and darkening around the edges, and Jim’s last thought was that he could not get Spock back now just to lose their baby…

*****

Jim opened his eyes slowly, taking in the bright white of the sickbay ceiling. He weakly moved his hand to his stomach – which was flat.

Jim’s breathing picked up in panic as his heart monitors beeped crazily, responding to his stress.

“Jim, calm down,” Bones ordered. “Breathe. In. Now out. Come on, kid. Don’t do this.”

“Baby!” Jim said weakly through gasping breaths. “My son?”

“He’s fine,” Bones said soothingly. “He’s fine. The nurses are cooing over him as we speak. He’s tiny, of course – born two months early. But he’s a fighter, just like his mommy.”

Jim let out a weak laugh at that, reaching forward to slug Bones on the shoulder – though with his arms feeling like jelly and moving like molasses going uphill in December on Delta Vega, Jim doubted that Bones felt it.

“I told you not to call me ‘mommy’, asshole,” Jim protested with a small smile. “I want to see my son.”

Bones nodded.

“I’ll we’ll his biobed in to your room,” the doctor agreed. “You can’t pick him up right now, but you can hold his hand and touch him and talk to him. I’m sure he’d like that.”

Jim’s smile spread at the thought of finally getting to see his son, though he was a little upset that he would not be able to hold him.

“Um…Bones?” Jim asked just before the doctor exited his private room. “Where are Spock and Kai?”

The doctor gave him a flat look.

“Your two lover-boys are being restrained in bio-beds of their own after getting into a fist fight in my sickbay! After stressing you into premature labor, to boot!”

“Fist fight?” Jim asked incredulously.

But Spock was always so _logical_ …and Kai was all about love and pacifism…

“They were both upset over me having to operate to get your boy out, and then they got into an argument about who’s fault it was that you were in your condition to begin with,” Bones said before slipping out of the room.

Jim laughed in disbelief – he couldn’t even picture those two fighting physically…

Bones came back in a few moments later, wheeling a tiny bio-bed with a bunch of monitors hooked up to it.

“Oh…” Jim whispered in awe, finally getting his first look at his little baby boy.

He was perfect…all ten fingers and all ten toes…little pointed ears and slightly arched eyebrows…dark blonde tufts of hair and a cute little scrunched up nose…

“Waaaah!” the baby screamed, opening his little mouth wide.

“He’s got a set of lungs,” Jim said proudly, softly stroking his little boy’s fingers. “Is he hungry?”

Bones just handed him a bottle, silently watching his best friend bond with his baby.

He didn’t tell Jim that if Spock and Kai had been just a few minutes later, this scene would have never taken place – they would have lost both of them.

If Spock hadn’t woken up last night with his memories intact – if he hadn’t slipped into Jim’s room for the night and stayed for the morning…

Deltans were not as strong as Vulcans, and Kai never would have gotten Jim to sickbay in time…

But Bones pushed those morbid thoughts away, fondly watching the cocky, undefeatable Captain James Tiberius Kirk be utterly slayed by a little baby suckling at a bottle hungrily.

“He’s so beautiful, Bones,” Jim whispered in awe, watching his son eat. “Is he really going to be okay?”

“I’d like to keep him in sickbay for the next few weeks for observation, but he should be fine,” Bones reassured him. “You will be able to hold him before you know it.”

“Can I stay with him?” Jim asked pleadingly, turning those big blue eyes to his best friend.

Bones had never been able to resist that look – most especially now, when it was amplified by the baby Jim was lovingly feeding.

“Course,” he muttered. “You can have this room. It’s the captain’s private room anyway – special confidentiality and all.”

“Thanks, Bones,” Jim beamed. “Oh…and Spock and Kai?”

Bones huffed.

“I suppose you want me to release them?” the doctor questioned sarcastically, already moving to the door.

“Thanks, Bones,” Jim repeated. “I really owe you.”

Bones looked back to lock eyes with his best friend, and he saw just how serious Jim was – he wasn’t just thanking him for letting the two troublemakers go, he was thanking him for everything.

For his son.

“Just make me godfather,” Bones answered after a beat, smiling at Jim’s enthusiastic nod.

“My son couldn’t ask for anyone better,” the captain replied, looking down at his little miracle.

*****

Jim pulled the bottle away after it emptied, and he couldn’t help but melt at the sight of his son suckling the air, as if the bottle would miraculously reappear if he willed it hard enough.

His baby was taking after him already…

Jim looked up as the door opened and Spock stepped through.

“Jim,” he whispered, for once the emotion plain in his voice as he gazed upon his mate and child. “You are all right.”

“Like Bones would let me be anything else,” Jim replied with a small grin. “Are you going to just stand there all day, or are you going to come over here and say hello to your son?”

Spock’s relief was obvious as his body relaxed from it’s stiff position, and he walked forward to look down at the tiny being he had created with his t’hy’la.

“He has your ears,” Jim offered after a few minutes of silence had passed, both of them staring down at awe at their little miracle as he drifted off to sleep.

Spock nodded in agreement, tearing his eyes away from his sleeping son to look at his tired mate.

“Have you named him?” Spock questioned, voice even – but Jim could see the insecurity.

“I was thinking Alexander,” Jim told him. “But I hadn’t really decided yet. I was supposed to have two more months.”

“Alexander,” Spock repeated, staring back down at their son. “Do you wish for George as his second name?”

Jim looked at him measuringly for a moment, and then shook his head in the negative.

“I was thinking Skon, after your grandfather,” Jim told him.

“Alexander Skon Kirk,” Spock said testingly, nodding his approval.

“Kirk?” his mate asked with some shock.

Spock’s dark eyes were serious as he said, “Our son will find acceptance in humans that he will never find in Vulcans – especially now that there are so few full-blooded Vulcans left. I do not wish to impose on him the teachings of Surak.”

Jim fought the tears that came to his eyes, looking down at his beautiful little boy.

“Alexander Skon Kirk,” he declared softly, reaching a hand forward to stroke the soft skin of his son’s wrist. “You are going to turn this universe upside-down, and your daddy and I can’t wait to see you grow up.”

And just like that, Spock knew that his mate had forgiven him. Not everything was better – not by any meaning of the word – but the Vulcan knew that they would raise their son together to the best of their abilities. He would have to confront Nyota, and Jim would have to discuss the situation with Ambassador Kai, but Spock was assured that all would soon be right with his t’hy’la.

Neither of them would allow anything less than a full return of their loving relationship – because it was no longer all about them.

And Spock could shrug off the teachings of Surak for long enough to admit that he was relieved, even happy – somehow, he had managed to wake up before he had lost it all.


End file.
